Love is Forever
by Zephyr Hearts
Summary: /Eli-Clare-Adam/ Nothing hurt worse than to watch the girl I fell in love with, kiss the guy that I thought was my best friend.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi, nor the quote in the summary. It belongs to its rightful owner. I own only my story.

A/N: I have no idea what happened to Love is Forever. I uploaded it a few hours ago, the next thing I know it's gone. -sighs- Oh well, I decided to upload a much better version of it. This one will make more sense. Once again, this story is inspired by the song If I'm James Dean You're Audrey Hepburn by Sleeping With Sirens. This story is Rated M for mature content, for self harm, drug abuse, language, and life threatening issues. You have been warned, so no complaints.

Enjoy!

Read and review! No reviews equals no updates! It's a win win for both of us.

* * *

Love is Forever

Summary: The pain was just too unbearable as I watched the girl I fell in love with, kiss the guy that I thought was my best friend.

* * *

Chapter 1: Insanity

Another day, another nightmare.

I turned the ignition off and stepped out of my car. I slammed the door shut and walked across the parking lot. I dragged my feet across the rocky cement and slowly made my way up the steps of the school. I opened the door, and walked to my locker that is towards the back of the school.

I sighed heavily, twisted the combination in and pulled the door open. I pulled my unneeded books out of my bag and tossed them into my locker. I grabbed my English book, and shoved it into my bag. I closed my locker and was greeted by a sweet, familar face.

"Morning Eli."

"Morning Clare." I muttered. She gave me a hug, and I as much as I didn't want to return it, I did. She pulled away and asked, "How are you today?" I shrugged my shoulders and sighed heavily again. I said, "I've been better." We walked to class in silence. I chewed on my bottom lip and swallowed the growing lump in my throat. Clare walked into the room, and I took my usual seat in front of her like I always did.

I leaned forward in my desk and picked at my black nails.

"Hey Clare."

I averted my gaze up from my nails when I heard that voice. I wanted to just move, get away, but I couldn't. If I skipped class again, I could get suspended. I sighed and turned around when said person was trying to get my attention. I grimmaced at his face.

"What is it Adam?" I asked.

"Nothing. I was just wondering if you wanted to hang out today?" I thought about it and came up with a quick lie saying, "I can't today. I have something to do." I turned back around and Clare tapped my shoulder. I leaned back and she whispered, "Eli, are you okay?" I nodded my head and leaned forward again.

"Good Morning class. Today you are going to get with your partners, and write a short narrative. It's due at the beginning of class tomorrow, chop chop. Get with your partners. I want to hear pencils hitting desks in a few minutes." Ms. Dawes announced. I turned around to face Clare, and noticed that she had already taken out her notebook and pen and started to brainstorm ideas. I got up and sat in my chair facing her.

"What do you want to write about?" Clare asked.

"I don't know. Anything is fine." I responded as I continued to pick at my nails, peeling the chipped black nail polish. She hit my head with her pen, and I looked up at her. I rose my eyebrows in question. I asked, "What?"

"Partners HELP each other. Help me think of ideas." Clare said.

"Okay. Girl likes boy, boy likes girl. Girl gets mad at boy, dumps him, then goes after his best friend." I snapped. Clare blinked a few times and she watched as I got up and stormed out of the room, not bothering in turning back when Ms. Dawes called out my name. I walked to the bathroom and locked myself in a stall. I punched the stall door and pressed my forehead against it. I slid down against the wall, and brought my knees up to my chest.

I burried my head in them and clenched my fists.

I breathed heavily, and felt my chest tighten. I lifted my head up and swallowed hard. I looked under the stall door, and made sure that no one was in the bathroom. I reached into my pocket and pulled out my wallet. I opened it and took a folded piece of paper out. I opened it and grabbed the razor in there.

I lifted my sleeve and placed the razor against my already cut skin. I clenched my jaw and watched as my skin split, and blood spilled through the small cut. I sighed and dropped the razor from my hand. Blood dripped off my arm and landed on the floor, creating a small puddle. I grabbed some toilet paper, and placed it over my arm. After I finally calmed down, I cleaned the blood on the floor, and got up, after I covered my arm with the sleeve of my black jacket.

I tossed the paper away, and walked out of the bathroom. When I opened the door, Adam was standing in front of me.

"Are you okay?" He asked.

"Why wouldn't I be?" I asked.

"You just stormed out of the classroom Eli." Adam pointed out the obvious. I walked by him and said, "Whatever. It shouldn't concern you." Adam sighed and he followed me to the classroom. I walked in and sat down in my chair.

"Nice of you to join us Mr. Goldsworthy. Are you feeling alright?" Ms. Dawes asked.

"Yeah. I'm fine. I wasn't feeling well." I responded.

I looked up at Clare and noticed the pained look in her blue eyes. I said, "Sorry about earlier. Let's write about something else." Clare nodded and she said, "I already thought of something. It's about a girl who is in love with a boy, and he doesn't feel the same for her." I moved my bangs away from my eyes, and she smiled a bit awkwardly at me.

I cracked my knuckles, and leaned back in my chair. I watched as she scribbled some words down on her notebook, then she suddenly stopped. Clare looked up at me and said out of nowhere, which caught me by surprise, "I thought you were over the fact that Adam and I are together."

"And I thought you were smarter than that." I responded.

"Eli. You said that it was okay." Clare said.

"Maybe I lied." I leaned in and glared at her. She swallowed hard and bowed her head, hiding her face from me. I sighed. How can I get over it? It was too hard for me! I love Clare, and after one little fight, she decides to dump me and go straight for my so called best friend. Some friend you are Adam.

"Let's drop this. I'd rather not think about it." I said.

"Fine." Clare muttered.

We continued to work, but in silence. After thirty minutes I started to read what she wrote. I was barely interested in it really. I made it looked like I was reading it, but I was actually looking above the paper, and watching Clare as she twisted her curly hair between her fingers. After five minutes I placed the paper down and she looked up asking, "Do you like it?"

"It's okay. You have to change a few things, but other than that it's good. If you want I can type it tonight, and revise it a little, then send it to you through email." I suggested. Clare nodded. The bell rung and everybody gathered their things. I quickly walked out of the classroom, and stood near my locker. I turned my attention to the door of the room I just exited.

I slammed my locker shut, and cursed under my breath. I can feel my chest tighten, as I walked by Adam and Clare.

The pain was just too unbearable as I watched the girl I fell in love with, kiss the guy that I thought was my best friend.

End of Chapter 1

* * *

Yes? No? Banana's? Oranges? You like? Leave me a review and let me know!

In other words...

See you soon!

MewIchigo24

Aishiteru!

Arigato for those who read and reviewed!

Sayonara -waves-


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi, I own only my story.

A/N: Thanks for the reviews. Here's chapter 2!

Random: There wasn't a quote in the summary, just thought I'd tell you. When the original story I posted was here, there was a quote in the summary, and I forgot to change it. Anyway. Proceed with CAUTION! Just so you know, this story might be done with in like two more chapters. But, I will do a side story for it, like a two chapter sequel!

Enjoy!

Read and review! No reviews equals no updates! It's a win win for both of us.

* * *

Love is Forever

Summary: The pain was just too unbearable as I watched the girl I fell in love with, kiss the guy that I thought was my best friend.

* * *

Chapter 2: Scream at Me

I tossed my bag next to my seat as I entered my second class. My chest was still tight as I continued to imagine Clare and Adam kissing. It was disgusting my eyes. I grimaced. I shuddered at the very thought. I clenched my hair in my hands and growled. I looked up when I felt a hand on my shoulder.

"Are you okay?" Coach Armstrong asked me.

"I'm fine." I muttered, looking down at my desk. He nodded and walked off. Coach Armstrong started to teach a lesson on long division, great. Second grade stuff. I rolled my eyes and licked the corner of my mouth. I leaned back and slouched in my chair and reached into my bag as I pulled out my notebook. I flipped through the pages and soon found an empty page.

I started to scribble and draw on it, and leaned my head against my hand. I pulled my black sharpie out and wrote over the words the I wrote, and the doodles that I drawn on the paper. A long heavy sigh escaped my lips and I soon started to imagine the two again. I felt like throwing up. I just can't believe Clare would go after my best friend. And Adam being my so called friend should've known better. He knew Clare was mine. He knew damn well that I loved her.

He's such a fucking backstabber. I slammed my fists on the desk causing the students around me to jump at my sudden action.

"Mr. Goldsworthy, are you okay?" Coach Armstrong asked, his eyebrow up in question.

"Can I be excused?" I asked, not lifting my head up from my desk. I knew he nodded his head, and I got up and exited the classroom. Instead of heading to the bathroom, I walked outside and sat down in a secluded place...the same place where Clare, Adam, and I filmed that Romeo and Juliet project. I sat down on the table and sighed heavily. Okay, I know skipping class is bad, but fuck, I needed time alone.

I laid back on the table and stared up at the trees. I swallowed the lump in my throat and pulled the sleeve of my jacket down and looked at the cuts on my arm. I ran my finger tips over them and raked my fingers through my hair.

"Eli?"

I sat up and pulled my sleeve down quickly.

"What are you doing here Clare?" I asked lowly.

"I could ask the same about you." She sat down next to me. I got a little nervous when I took note that she was looking down at my arm. I crossed my arms across my chest and said, "Seriously, what are you doing here?" She place her bag on the table and pulled out a notebook and a pen.

"I come here for my free period." She stated. Clare opened her notebook and she began to write. I watched her curiously. Clare reached up and she tucked her hair behind her ear. I reached up and without realizing, I started to play with her hair. Clare looked up and she looked at my hand. She said nervously, "Eli? What are you doing?" I moved closer to her. Clare's face turned pink as I moved much closer to her.

God, I missed it so much.

I missed grazing my lips against hers and watching her face turn pink. I cupped her face and her eyes closed. I was so close. I could feel her breath on my face, and I closed the gap between us. I crushed my lips over hers, and Clare tried to pull away, but I grasped the back of her head and crushed my lips harder over hers. Clare whimpered and I passed my tongue along her bottom lip.

Clare moaned and she hesitantly parted her lips. I darted my tongue into her mouth and she gasped. I pushed my tongue in deeper, tasting her sweet mouth. Clare's eyes shot open, and she pushed me away.

"Eli, what are you doing?"

"Clare...you didn't...I thought...

"You thought wrong. Eli, I can't do this...not to Adam." Clare interrupted me and looked away.

"Who cares about Adam. What about me!" I shouted.

I watched her nervously bite her lip. Clare looked over at me, then back at the ground, averting her gaze slowly. I opened my mouth to speak, but Clare cut me off, she moved to me and her lips were over mine. I swallowed the lump in my throat and she pulled away, her forehead glued to mine. She looked up at me when she pulled away. Clare said, "Eli...I can't do this to Adam. I'm sorry. I'm...we have to be friends only." She got up to leave, and I reached out and grabbed her wrist.

"Only friends? Clare, just last week we were dating. Then because I went over the line with Fitz, you decided to dump me, and you did the worse fucking bitch ass move ever and went after my best friend." I said in an icy tone.

"Eli...you're hurting me." Clare whined as my grip on her wrist tightened.

"And...and you don't think you're not hurting me?" I muttered.

"What?" She questioned. I sighed heavily and let go of her small wrist. I pulled the sleeves of my jacket down and showed her my arms. She gasped, and covered her mouth. I said, "This is what you and Adam have both caused. I thought I had the will power to stop. Now it's become a habit." Clare walked up to me and she sat down next to me. She took my arm in her hand and grazed her small finger tips over the cuts.

"Eli...why would you go so far into doing this?" She asked. I shrugged my shoulders. I said, "It feels good. It helps me calm down." I lowered my gaze and Clare looked up at me again, her eyes glazed with tears that haven't fallen yet. She said, "Eli you have to stop doing this."

"Easier said than done Blue Eyes." I responded. I pulled my arms away and pulled the sleeves down. I started to walk away, but I turned back and said, "You have no room to tell me what I have to stop Clare. I do this because you and Adam drove me to do it. It's your fault. Blame yourself. I'm not going to stop." I turned away, not wanting to see her cry. I heard her sob, and I continued to walk away.

I entered the school and heard the bell ring. I walked to my class and quickly grabbed my bag and walked out before Coach Armstrong could notice. I walked to my locker and twisted the combination in. I opened my locker and tossed my math book in there. When I closed my locker I turned around and saw Adam standing in front of me.

"What do you want?" I asked.

"Nothing. Clare is normally here waiting for me, but she's not. Have you seen her?" Adam walked up to me.

I shook my head saying, "I don't have a leash on her. She's your girlfriend." I grimaced at the word. I walked by him and as I headed to my next class, I bumped into someone, knocking them down. When I realized who it was, I helped her up.

"Sorry Clare." I muttered.

I walked by her and I listened to Adam ask why she is crying after I helped her up. I looked back and watched Clare shake her head, not wanting to tell him. And she better hope she doesn't. I scratched the back of my head and walked into my class. I chewed on the inside of my bottom lip, and realized that I had made Clare cry earlier. That's another reason why she broke up with me...

She said I had an act of making her cry. I couldn't help it. I mean if she said something that'll push my buttons, I'm going to say something mean. I don't mean to make her cry. Hell, I hate to see her cry.

I laid my head down on my desk and refused to let anybody see that I was crying.

Clare dumping me was all my fault.

If I would've listened to her, I'm pretty sure she and I would still be together. I always have to fucking ruin everything. I clenched the sleeve of my jacket and let the tears fall and drip on the desk.

"Eli." I looked up after I rubbed my eyes with my sleeve.

"Hm?" I asked.

"Mrs. Souvet needs to see you in her office."

Great...Clare decided to fucking go that far and tell the guidance counciler. I got up and walked out of the classroom. I headed to the guidance councilers office, and knocked on the door. I heard Mrs. Souvet say, "Come in." I opened the door and walked in, finding Clare and Adam sitting in two of the three chairs in front of her desk.

"Please take a seat Eli." She said. I sat down.

"What's this about?" I asked.

"Well...to put it simply. Your friends are worried about you." Mrs. Souvet tells me. I tried not to laugh. I only twisted my eyes and looked away. Mrs. Souvet said, "Is there something funny about this? Eli, Clare tells me that you're hurting yourself." I looked over at Clare and noticed that her head was bowed. I looked over at Mrs. Souvet and I said, "It's not really any of their business is it?" I clenched the arm rest of the chair. Mrs. Souvet narrowed her eyes at me questionably.

"If they're your friends Eli it is their business if they care about you."

"That's fucking hilarious. If they cared about me as much as they said, they wouldn't be doing what they're doing now. I'm sorry, but I can't be here right now. I can't continue to listen to this bull shit." I got up and stormed out of the room. I paced outside in the room before I decided to go to the bathroom again. I burst through the door, and eyed the person standing in front of me.

"Emo boy."

"Fitz." I muttered.

I walked by him and shut myself in the large stall. I sat down against the door, and breathed heavily.

"Hey emo boy, open up." Fitz pounded his fist on the door and I growled in frustration. I clenched my hair in my hands and soon got up. I opened the door and screamed, "What the hell do you want! What is it!" Fitz narrowed his eyes at me and he shoved me into the stall, pushing me up against it. I glared at him with the same icy glare and Fitz said, "You need to learn how to keep your mouth shut."

"Then leave me alone." I shoved Fitz away and pushed him out of the stall. I locked it and swallowed the lump in my throat. I heard Fitz walk out and I sighed in relief. I reached into my back pocket and grabbed my wallet, and pulled the folded note out.

I grabbed the razor and lifted my sleeve. I held my breath and placed the razor against my wrist, and created another cut. I hissed and continued to cut that place on my wrist. The cut was deep, and dripping blood quickly. I reached up and grabbed a good amount of toilet paper, and placed it over my wrist. My nerves soon calmed down and in attempt, I wrapped a good amount of toilet paper around my wrist, and got up. I pulled my sleeve down, and hid my razor in the folded note and shoved it in my wallet.

I walked out of the bathroom, not realizing that blood was dripping from my fingers, and seeping through my jacket.

End of Chapter 2

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Oh no! What's going to happen next? Ehh...just um, don't hate me please! -hides behind chair- Leave me a review if you want the next chapter! I promise that the next chapter will be much longer, and it will make more sense as to why Eli is cutting himself.

In other words...

See you soon!

MewIchigo24

Aishiteru!

Arigato for those who read and reviewed!

Sayonara -waves-


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi, I own only my story.

A/N: I'm sorry for the long wait! But um, thanks for the reviews! Here's chapter 3! This story is almost done, and um...just uh...please don't hate me! This chapter is kind of upsetting...anyway!

Enjoy!

Read and review! No reviews equals no updates! It's a win win for both of us.

_"word"_ flashbacks

* * *

Love is Forever

Summary: The pain was just too unbearable as I watched the girl I fell in love with, kiss the guy that I thought was my best friend.

* * *

Chapter 3: Cry for You

I walked into the classroom and sat down at my desk, not really caring about the looks I was getting. I looked up at the board and blinked a few times. I was feeling a little light headed to be honest. My vision blurred and I shook my head a little.

"Eli. Your bleeding." I heard someone say. I breathed a little heavy and looked down at my arm. I lifted it up from the desk and eyed the smeared blood on my desk. I swallowed hard and felt my eyes grow wide. Absentmindedly, I pulled my sleeve down and the roll of paper that I had wrapped around my wrist fell, hitting the floor.

I listened to people scream and say obsene words.

I cursed under my breath and clenched my wrist, only to have the blood continue to flow.

Before I could do anything else, my vision blackened.

"Somebody call 911!"

.  
.

_"Clare!" I called out to her. She smiled at me when she turned around. I walked up to her and wrapped my arms around her waist before I kissed her. She pulled away and smiled again. Clare pinned her eyebrows together and she said, "Eli. What happened to your lip?"_

_"Oh this? Don't worry about it."_

_"...Eli it's still bleeding." Clare pointed out. I wiped the blood away and looked at the heel of my hand and frowned a bit. I said, "It's not bleeding a lot. It doesn't hurt really." Clare pressed her lips into a line and she asked, "Did you get into another fight with Fitz?" I looked down at her, wondering if that question was relevant to answer._

_"I didn't start it if that's what you're asking." I watched her blue eyes sadden. I said, "Clare I'm being serious." She nodded slowly. _

_Clare wrapped her arm around my waist and I wrapped mine around her shoulders. We walked out of the halls and headed outside since this was our lunch period. We sat out on the tables, and talked for a few minutes._

_"Eli, please tell me you're going to end this fued with Fitz. It's not worth it." Clare said, placing a hand on mine._

_I sighed and swallowed hard. _

_I looked into her blue eyes and I smiled at her a little._

_"I promise I'll stop." I said. She smiled._

_Clare leaned over and she kissed my cheek. I interlaced our fingers together and sighed a little. Clare looked over at me and she blinked a few times. I stared at the table and blanked out a little bit. She leaned her head on my shoulder._

_"Eli. Let's hang out today." Clare murmured._

_She looked at me with big puppy eyes and I smirked._

_"Okay." I said._

_I mean, I couldn't just say no that face. Clare is just too cute. We sat outside for a while and waited for our lunch period to finally be over. I led Clare to class, but before we did, I softly pushed her aside._

_"Eli? Eli we can't go in here we'll get in trouble." Clare hissed as we entered an empty classroom, the media class. The lights and computers were all off. Perfect. I softly pushed Clare up against the wall and kissed her. I didn't want us to get caught in the hallway, nor did I want people to see us, so an empty classroom would've been better. And, I really didn't feel like walking all the way down to the boiler room._

_Clare whimpered when I softly bit her lower lip. She opened her mouth and I thrust my tongue into her mouth. I tried not to lose control in front of her. I haven't kissed her like this in a while, nor have I touched her in a while, so I kept my hands on her hips._

_Her hands moved around my neck and pulled me closer to her. Our tongue moved around and I licked her bottom lip before we parted. I watched Clare slowly open her eyes and I smirked, placing a chaste kiss on her lips._

.  
.

"What is that?"

"Sounds like a siren."

"It sounds really close."

"There's an ambulance parked outside."

Clare looked around and she too was just as curious. She got up and walked to the window and looked outside it. She blinked a few times and watched as two people jumped out of the ambulance and held the stretcher as the wheels hit the ground.

"Okay class. Please just get away from the window. I'll be right back."

The teacher walked out, and she left the students all alone in the classroom. Of course one had to get up and walk to the door to check and see what was going on. Clare, not as curious as she was anymore (well she is really curious, but she wasn't going to show it), she sat back down in her desk and started to review in her notes.

"Hey Clare."

She looked up.

"Yes?" She asked.

"That emo kid you hang out with is getting carried out on the stretcher."

"What?" She asked. Clare got up and she burst out of the classroom. She stopped in the middle of the hallway. Before she could continue to walk, a teacher had grabbed her wrist holding her back. Everything around her was quiet, as if no sounds were emitting. And it felt as in everything was just moving around in slow motion. Clare struggled in the teachers grasp and cried.

"Let me go! Let me go!" She screamed. Clare broke free from the teacher and ran to the stretcher.

"Eli. Eli please...Eli wake up."

"Ma'am, I need you to let go." The man pushing the stretcher said.

"No!" Clare cried. Someone pried her off and she cried heavy sobs. Principal Simpson rubbed her back and she cried hard in his arms

.  
.

_"I will be passing back your papers from last week. Most of you did pretty good," Mr. Purino placed my paper on my desk, "While some of did fare," He placed a paper on Adam's desk, that had a big red C on the corner. I smiled a little, watching Adam curse under his breath._

_"Okay. I have a lot of things to do. Keep your voices low. If I can hear your conversation you're too loud." Mr. Purino said as he sat behind his desk. I turned to Adam and said, "It's just a C man. I don't think the end of the world is coming." Adam looked freaked._

_"My mom is the end of the world Eli. If she finds this out," He pointed at the paper, "I'm dead meat." Adam clenched his head in his hands. I said, "Oh. Well I'm sorry." I shrugged my shoulders. Sure, I cared, but...I mean it's not MY ass on the line._

_I got really bored all of a sudden since Adam was still sulking next to me._

_"Okay Adam, we get it. You're dead, let's talk about something else." I said. Adam sighed and nodded._

_"How are you and Clare?" He asked._

_I smiled._

_"We're good. We're hanging out today." _

_"Oh, that's good." Adam frowned._

_"Why the long face machismo?" I asked._

_"Well. You guys are always hanging out, and today is guys night." Adam said. I frowned, now remembering that today is guys night. I said, "I'm sorry Adam. I forgot, can we reschedule?" Adam shrugged his shoulders._

_"It's okay. It doesn't matter." He flashed me a fake smile._

_"Adam, really. We can hang out tomorrow, just you and me." I insisted._

_"Eli. It's fine. Forget it." Adam snapped._

_"Fine. Be a dick." I muttered and turned back to face the front._

_"Eli, stop being rude." Adam growled._

_"Adam, quit acting like a girl." I responded. I took note at what I said and I sighed saying, "Adam I didn't mean it like that." Adam sighed. He got up and quickly exited the classroom. God dammit..._

.  
.

"Clare?"

"Clare what's wrong?"

"Adam! It's Eli! He's...something's happened to him!" Clare cried repeatedly as she broke free from Principal Simpson's arms and ran to Adam. She crashed into his chest and he wrapped his arms around her waist. He rubbed her back and said, "Do you know what's wrong with him?"

"I don't know. I just saw him getting carried out. He looked awful Adam. He looked so pale." Clare cried into his chest. She clenched his shirt and sobbed freely. Adam said, "Come on. I'll get us a ride to the hospital." He took Clare's hand in hers and he pulled her out of the school, not bothering to stop when Principal Simpson shouted for them to come back.

He couldn't.

Eli is his friend no matter what shit they went through, and he knew that deep down...Clare still loved him. It didn't take them long to find a ride; Coach Armstrong was outside keeping the students away, and once the ambulance left. He drove Adam and Clare to the hospital.

Clare practically jumped out of the car the minute he parked.

She ran inside towards the emergency room.

"Clare! Clare wait!" Adam shouted for her to stop. She stood in the middle of the lobby and held herself. Clare sat down in an empty seat and sobbed in her hands.

"Why would Eli do this? Why would he go this far into doing something like this?" Clare cried. Adam sat down next to her and wrapped his arm around her quivering shoulders. Clare leaned into him and stared blankly at the white floor; her tears streamed down her face, not stopping whatsoever.

"Clare. Please don't cry anymore. Eli will pull through I promise." Adam said. Clare sniffled and looked over at Adam. Her eyes were already blood shot. She felt her face heat up when he placed a small kiss on her temple. Clare suddenly remembered the kiss she and Eli shared.

"Adam...I have something I need to tell you." Clare said through broken sobs.

Adam blinked a few times.

"Eli...we...Eli and I kissed earlier." She said, looking over at him, her tears never ceased to stop.

"What?" Adam asked.

"Eli kissed me, and then...I told him that I couldn't do this to you, and then I kissed him back." Clare said. Adam swallowed the lump in his throat. He was hurt, but he wasn't going to let it show. Adam knew all too well that Clare still loved him.

"Clare...it's fine. We'll talk about this...later." Adam smiled faintly at her. Clare smiled at Adam and hugged him.

"Thanks Adam, you're always so understanding." She said in between a choked out sob.

'If you only knew what I was really thinking Clare.' Adam thought as his eyes sadden and closed.

End of Chapter 3

* * *

Chapter 4 is next! And that will be the end of this story! I know you probably wanted to find out more of what has happened between Eli and Clare, and you will find out next time! I promise to update as soon as possible! Leave me a review!

In other words...

See you soon!

MewIchigo24

Aishiteru!

Arigato for those who read and reviewed!

Sayonara -waves-


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi, I own only my story.

A/N: I'm sorry for the long wait! But um, thanks for the reviews! Here's chapter 3! This story is almost done, and um...just uh...please don't hate me! This chapter is kind of upsetting...anyway!

Enjoy!

Read and review! No reviews equals no updates! It's a win win for both of us.

_"word"_ flashbacks

* * *

Love is Forever

Summary: The pain was just too unbearable as I watched the girl I fell in love with, kiss the guy that I thought was my best friend.

* * *

Chapter 4: Love is Forever

_I had exited the classroom to find Adam. I knew what I said was wrong, but damn, he pushed me over board. I tried to reason with him, but the little shit was being a little bit too much of ass about this. I found him walking around in the hallway. His head was hung low and his hands were shoved into his pockets. I placed a hand on his shoulder and he turned around. I taken a good look at him and noticed that he had unshed tears in his eyes._

_"Adam. Look, I'm sorry about before." I said._

_"Whatever man. Don't worry about it." Adam flashed me a smirk, and I said, "That's it?"_

_"Yup. Let's go to class." Adam brushed by me. I turned to him and sighed. I followed him to class and we sat down. For the rest of the period we were quiet. I thought that since I apologized we would be talking, but, psh, I was wrong. _

_The bell rung and we walked out._

_I walked to my locker and I felt someone's arms around my waist._

_"Hey Eli." _

_"Hey Clare."_

_I turned around and Clare got up on her tip toes, and kissed me. I found it really cute that she was shorter than I. I smirked and hugged her close to me. She said, "So what do you want to do today?" I said, "Well... we can go to my place." I backed her up against the locker, and watched her face turn red._

_"A-and do what?"_

_Clare is so naive sometimes._

_"Anything you want." I kissed her neck and she softly slapped my arm. I pulled away and laughed a little._

.  
.

Two hours had passed.

Clare and Adam didn't move from their seats. Clare had long since stopped crying. Her eyes were red and puffy, and she stared blankly at the floor. Adam got up and he walked to the soda machine. He got him and Clare something to drink. Adam walked back and he handed Clare a soda.

She took it with a small smile and opened the can.

As if she were dehydrated, Clare chugged the soda, and placed the almost empty can on the small table in front of her. Adam got up and he walked to the front desk. The lady behind the desk looked up and smiled. She said, "Can I help you?"

"Yeah. Two hours ago, a boy was pulled in here, is he out of the emergency room yet?"

"What is his name?" She asked.

"Eli Goldsworthy."

"Eli, Eli... um, I have an Elijah Goldsworthy."

"Yeah. That's him. Is he okay?" Adam asked, as he leaned forward, trying to get an answer from her. The nurse said, "He's been out for about ten minutes now. If you want to see him, his room is just down the hall here, and the last one on the left." She pointed through the doors. Adam nodded. He walked back, grasped Clare's arm and pulled her up.

"A-Adam?" Clare stammered.

Adam didn't answer her. They soon stood in front of a door. He said, "Clare... I know you probably want to talk to him alone. So I'll wait in the lobby okay?" Clare swallowed hard and watched Adam disappear back into the lobby.

She stood in front of the door and sighed heavily.

.  
.

_The day had gone by quickly and I was a little bit too excited because Clare and I were going to be alone, in my house... ALONE. I walked to her locker, and waited patiently for Clare, but she didn't show up after five minutes. I pushed myself off the lockers and decided to go look for her. _

_"Fitz, please won't you just leave Eli and Adam alone?" I heard someone say._

_"Why should I? The little emo bitch fucked with me, so he had this coming for a while." I was curious as to what this gorilla was talking about so I made it look like I was walking and I pretended to look startled, finding Fitz talking with my girlfriend._

_"Speak of the devil." Fitz walked around Clare and I looked over at her._

_She gave me a look, that same look saying "you promised". I wasn't intending on doing anything._

_That is until the bastard socker punched my jaw. I stumbled back, listening to Clare screech. I held my jaw and groaned._

_As much as I wanted to keep my promise, I couldn't. I wasn't going to let Fitz off that easily. I surprised him by punching him square in the face, I heard his nose break and I smirked in success, laughing as he held his nose that had blood pouring out of it. _

_I looked over at Clare and she glared at me, her arms crossed across her chest. I watched her blaze passed me and she turned around the corner. I followed after her and realized that she was already out the doors. Damn, she's quick. I ran out and grabbed her arm, and turned her around._

_"Clare, what the hell?"_

_"Eli you promised you wouldn't do anything." Clare almost yelled._

_I stood there, eyeing her in disbelief._

_"You're seriously going to stand there, and tell me that I couldn't do anything, when you just saw what the hell just happened back there." I snapped. Clare looked down at the ground and I reached up and grasped her chin. I forced her to look up at me. She sighed._

_"Eli... it was only going to cause more problems if you hit him back-_

_"Clare, do you realize what the fuck you're saying?"_

_"Eli stop cursing at me!" She snapped in anger, slapping my hand from her chin. I breathed heavily and looked down at her. She had unshed tears in her eyes and I swallowed hard. I said, "Clare don't cry please. I'm sorry okay."_

_"No! It's not okay." Clare sobbed._

_I wrapped my arms around her shoulders and she struggled to break free. Ha. Clare wasn't going to get away from me that easily. I held her tighter and she tried pushing away. Clare soon stopped struggling and I looked down at her. She looked up and I brushed the tears under her eyes away with my thumb. _

_Clare swallowed the lump in her throat and she said, "Eli. Please let me go." I blinked and soon let her free. She walked down the steps of the school, and I stood there dumbfounded, eyeing her as she left, not bothering to look back. I frowned and sat down on the steps, staring at the ground._

_I fucked up..._

_again._

.  
.

"Eli...Eli please wake up."

"Eli."

I slowly opened my eyes, and looked at the blurred figure sitting down next to me. I squeezed my eyes shut then opened them, trying to clear my vision. The blurred figure soon came into clearing, and I eyed her.

"Where am I?" I asked.

"Hospital." She said.

"Oh." I muttered. I looked down at my bandaged arm and frowned. I can't believe that I lost control, especially to the point that I would put myself in the hospital. My thoughts were broken when I felt a pair of arms link around my waist. I looked down to find Clare looking up at me with glassy blue eyes. I wanted to say something, but she had burst into a series of sobbing.

"Eli. I'm- I'm so glad you're awake." She sobbed.

"It's not like I had fallen under a coma Clare." I said smugly. Clare looked up at me and she moved her body onto the bed. I watched her lay her head on my chest. I shifted my eyes and placed my arm around her waist. She said, "I was so scared."

Scared?

I licked my bottom lip and asked, "Why?" I knew that was a stupid question, but maybe I wanted to hear it from her. Clare looked up and said, "Eli... I almost lost you. I sat in the lobby for two hours, wondering if... if you did this because of me..." Clare's voice was softened, and she held my bandaged arm. I get it now.

"Clare... I didn't do this because of you..." I managed to say.

"Th-then why did you... why would you do this? Eli why?" Clare sat up and looked at me, she sobbed freely in front of me and I never felt so horrible in my entire fucking life. She bowed her head and I watched the sheets that I lay under become slightly soaked with her tears. She wasn't cry a river, but it was enough to damp the sheets. I reached up to touch her. I lifted her chin up and she stared at me with her red puffy eyes.

"Clare, please don't cry." I said.

"W-why not?" She stammered.

I brought her closer to me she lay on my lap, I opened my legs a little to give her more room. I said, "Because... I don't like to see you cry. Clare, I didn't do this because of you. It wasn't your fault. It was mine, so... please just... stop crying." I cupped her face and looked into her eyes. She licked her bottom lip. Clare closed the gap between us, and we were soon swapping spit on my hospital bed.

.  
.

_Three days went by._

_Three long ass fucking days._

_Clare and I stopped talking since the day I cussed her out because of the Fitz problem that happened. _

_Adam had called me yesterday and screamed at me, calling me a dumb shit, and that I was stupid for what I did to Clare. We argued for about thirty minutes, and the only thing that really fucking confused me is when he told me that I should stay away from them. Yes, THEM. As in Clare and Adam. I didn't really fucking care about what he meant by that, so I slept a little bit calmly that night, and waited for what I was "excited to see" at school tomorrow._

_I woke up the next morning... late._

_I growled in frustration as I stumbled out of my room getting dressed. I stormed out of the house with my bag and keys in hand. I jumped into Morty and drove quickly to school. I looked at the time and realized I had just enough time to walk into my first period class, probably five minutes late. Ms. Dawes didn't seem to mind it these days._

_I soon arrived in the Degrassi parking lot. I turned the ignition off and climbed out. I really had no idea why the fuck I was in such a hurry to get to school. It's only school... sigh. I opened the doors and as I made my way to my class, I saw the most... unbelievable thing._

_"Adam... what the fuck!" I shouted._

_Startled, he pulled away from Clare's mouth._

_"E-Eli." Clare stammered._

_"What. The. Fuck." I spat angrily._

_"Eli, I thought Adam told you." Clare said. I tried not to laugh._

_"Adam didn't fucking tell me shit! Enjoy the rest of your damn lives." I turned around and walked out of the school. I walked to Morty and tossed my things inside. I was so fucking pissed off that I didn't even hear Clare call out to me. I sat in the driver's side, clenching the steering wheel. I felt a pain in my chest. And this fucking pain hurt like hell._

_I clenched the steering wheel tighter, and my knuckles turned white from the grip. _

_Before I could even think about what was going on around me, I had started to sob. Right now if a pig started fucking flying next to me, I wouldn't have cared enough to watch it. I was so pissed off. Pissed off to the point that I started to cry and sob heavily. Out of all the things Clare could do, she does this! With my fucking best friend! _

_I turned the ignition on and drove out of the parking lot. I wasn't really aware of where I was driving, I was just wanting to get the fuck out of here. _

_Away from the school._

_Away from Adam._

_And away from... Clare._

_I ended up stopping at the park, and I only started to cry harder. The pain in my chest hurt. It hurt so much that I had trouble breathing. I got out of the car and started to throw things around, grabbing anything I could and tossing it, kicking it, breaking it. _

_I don't fucking get it._

_I sat down on the hood of Morty and clenched my fists. I averted my gaze to the ground, where a broken piece of glass lies._

.  
.

I held Clare close to me after our little make out session. I felt kind of bad, because... I'm pretty sure she is still with... with Adam. I sighed and she looked up at me. Clare said, "Um, I think I'm going to go get Adam." I nodded and she slowly crawled off me. I watched as she disappeared from my room.

Clare walked into the lobby and stood looking around in confusion.

"Oh, excuse me Miss."

She turned to the nurse and the nurse waved for her to come to her. Clare walked up to the desk and the nurse said, "Um, the boy that was with you asked me to give this to you. He said that he had to leave." She handed Clare a folded piece of paper and Clare took it. She went to sit down in a chair and opened the folded note.

_Clare,_

_I didn't want to tell you this before when you were upset, so I wrote it down before I could leave. I know you still love Eli. Hell, I can see it in your eyes, so I saved us both some time. I like you Clare, but not in that way, I know you just needed a shoulder to cry and I happened to be there. It did piss me off about what Eli did to you, but... he needs you more than ever, and I'm just in the way of everything._

_Clare you're a great friend, so... just forgive Eli, and let's all have everything back to normal. Please..._

_Love always,_

_Adam._

_P.S. Tell Eli I'll see him tomorrow, since I know that he won't be let out for a while, knowing that he's going to be on suicide watch or something._

_Bye Clare..._

Clare folded the note and licked her bottom lip. She sniffled and dabbed her eyes with her sleeve. Clare got up and put the note in her pocket.

.

I was busy scanning through the T.V. channels, and I looked towards the door when I saw that Clare walked in. She sat down next to me and I asked, "Where's Adam?" Clare sat down on the bed and said, "He's um... he had to go. He said that he'll come see you tomorrow though." I placed a hand on her shoulder and I felt her quivering. I pinned my eyebrows together and Clare sniffled.

"Are you okay?" I asked, hoping I didn't do anything wrong again.

"I'm fine." Clare flashed me a smile.

"Everything is going to be okay now Eli. I promise." She hugged my waist and I hugged her in return. I let those words swim around in my head. I smiled to myself and Clare looked up at me, she kissed me, and smiled softly.

"Clare," I started to say, "I- I love you... I love you so much." I looked into her blue eyes, and she smiled.

Clare let out a small choked out sob and said, "I love you too, Eli."

With that, I kissed her again, and we both laid back on the hospital bed, holding each other.

End!

* * *

God, I haven't cried this hard since The Notebook -blows nose-. Anyway, before you start asking, yes I am going to post a sequel to this story, but it will probably be one very long one-shot, maybe a two-shot, I'm not sure yet. Anyway, leave me a review of what you think of this chapter, and if you want the upcoming short sequel!

In other words...

See you soon!

MewIchigo24

Aishiteru!

Arigato for those who read and reviewed!

Sayonara -waves-

Oh, and um. The song If I'm James Dean, You're Audrey Hepburn is on my profile if you would like to listen to it, which is the song that inspired me to write this story. Anyway, goodbye, for now!


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